The Bumps of Life

Conventional wisdom says that you can never be too well-off or too good-looking. That’s a myth! According to the Bible our weaknesses are what make us strong because they cause us to depend on resources that are outside of ourselves. Of course the main source of strength when we’re feeling overwhelmed is God. Secondly, we can depend on other people to help us out. Especially helpful are those who have been through what we’re going through.

Everyone has weaknesses. What differentiates one person from another is whether or not one admits his or her weaknesses and then what is done about them. A college recruiter interviewed a high school basketball star. The recruiter said, “I hear you’re pretty good.” “The best there is,” the player replied. “I averaged 45 points a game, was the best rebounder in school history, and I led our team to three straight undefeated seasons and three state championships.” “That’s incredible,” said the recruiter. “Tell me,” he asked, “Do you have any weaknesses?” “Well,” said the non-Lebron sheepishly, “I do have a tendency to exaggerate.”

We all have weaknesses. There are no perfect “10’s” in the world. Ninety percent of men rank themselves above average athletically, which is statistically impossible. Very often we’re only legends in our own minds, but our weaknesses can become strengths. People who think that they’re perfect remain emotional adolescents and spiritual babies. Emotional and spiritual maturities are forged in life’s furnaces.

George Reedy was President Lyndon Johnson’s press secretary. He was a very persuasive person, as presidential press secretaries need to be. He was so persuasive that he convinced President Johnson that he should never have any assistants who were under 40 and who hadn’t suffered any major life disappointments. Without that maturity and without that disappointment, Reedy felt these people were under-qualified and overly conceited.

It’s not that optimism is a bad thing, but sometimes too much early success has a tendency to spoil us. We begin to think of ourselves as clever. We begin to rely on our ability rather than our hard work. Worse than that, we begin to rely on ourselves rather than on God. Everyone who does anything spectacular in life knows what it is to have failures. It’s what they do with failure that separates the truly successful from the also-rans. I pretty much disagree with ruling out the young in leadership circles due to their lack of hard-knocks. My wife is an Elementary Guidance Counselor and I get to hear the horror stories of bullying victims. I remember my own early years and their toll on my self-esteem. Everyone, if truth be told, has been through life’s crucible of crisis, and age hasn’t got anything to do with that. My 30 year-old daughter with a brain tumor is a whole lot more seasoned than I am with life’s crud.

What makes for a blessed 30-something or 50-something, with or without a brain tumor, is that failure throws us into seeking help – from God and others. One of the most revealing lines in literature appears in the opening paragraph of A.A. Milne’s Winnie-the-Pooh: “Here is Edward Bear coming downstairs now, bump, bump, bump, on the back of his head, behind Christopher Robin. It is, as far as he knows, the only way of coming downstairs, but sometimes he feels that there really is another way… if only he could stop bumping for a moment and think of it!”

Well there is another way and that’s to ask for help when you’re bumping through life. I know we won’t make it with everything that’s been tossed our way this summer without help. We will keep on bumping along because that’s the way life is, but thanks be to God and you – we will survive. Your prayers and support have made a difference. Thank you and thank God.

Give Me a Story to Tell and Make it Relevant

I like story-telling, narrative preaching or whatever you want to call it. My grandfather, Papa, as we called him, would let me snuggle in the bed with him and he would start a story and tell me to finish it. It was great at such an early age to be mentored in the art of story-telling. Papa would lead off with a wild yarn and I would try to make it wilder, then he would ask the hard but creative question, "What did the story mean to you?"

Story and meaning have been on my mind as I've been perusing the UMC Call to Action Committee's reports on our church. It has been interesting to read the Towers Watson report on the driving forces of vitality in the UMC. One of the factors mentioned specifically is "Using more topical preaching in Traditional service." I've been a lectionary preacher for years, but have always attempted to be topical at the same time: timely, practical, relevant. The studies of our denomination have been fascinating. You can find the Towers Watson and Apex reports at http://www.umc.org/calltoaction under "Research Projects."

The Towers Watson summary says that there are four key areas identified as vitality-drivers: number of small groups, empowered and effective lay leadership, relevant worship experiences, and excellent pastoral leadership including good preaching and length of tenure. Likewise the Apex group has studied the UMC and has found that mission clarity, competency, and "distance issues" between the general agencies, Bishops and the local church have exacerbated a relevancy crisis for our denomination.

The point that keeps zinging me is about story-telling and relevancy. As a District Superintendent I'm going from charge conference to charge conference this time of year. I am trying to support connectionalism and especially connectional giving in these difficult economic times. I am absolutely convinced that people will give if they can put a face on apportionments. The same is true for local churches. The studies show that churches that have more face-time activities are vital. If the general church via agencies and bishops can give more face-time to local constituencies then they will be more relevant. It's all about telling a personal story.

My fear is that we have too many people from bottom to top and top to bottom that don't have a story to tell. We aren't doing so hot in terms of relevancy because we're not answering all the questions that people are asking. Sometimes we're answering questions that people are not even asking. That is useless. But, I'm thinking in the back of my pea-brain, that the story that is too often untold or the penultimate unanswered question is "What is the meaning of life?" If I cannot answer that question with the Jesus-story in my own story then relevancy is shot to you-know-where. The Gospel is the essence of relevancy.

So I'll finish with a story. Make of it what you will. Talk is cheap and actions speak louder than words. It seems in this story that the Pope needed a heart transplant. After word spread that the Pope needed a new heart, letters, emails, phone calls, and telegrams poured into the Vatican with offers from people to give the Pope their heart. The Pope pondered how he would decide from so many donors whose heart he would take. He couldn’t believe that so many people were so willing to give up their lives so he could receive their heart. He came up with a plan. On the appointed day announced ahead to the world, he would stand on the balcony of the Pope’s chambers overlooking St. Peter’s Square and drop a feather. Whoever it landed on would be the blessed donor. The day came and the Pope stood and dropped the feather. It floated down, down, down, until it was just above the heads of the gathered throng. People were shouting, “Take my heart, Pope, Take my heart!” Then just as the feather almost landed it was, “Take my heart, Pope – Blow,Whew; Take my heart, Pope, Blow/Whew”

Are We What We Wear? Maybe, Maybe not!

I came to work yesterday in jeans and a casual shirt. I was very tired from Charge Conferences, didn't feel like dressing up, so I just came to the office for pastoral consultations as is, and went to Charge Conference dressed the same way. I've felt a little guilty ever since. I need to take some clothes to the cleaners, but that's just an excuse. I just didn't feel like it.

How does it make you feel to go to a special function and there is someone there who is inappropriately dressed? Are you tired of the dressed-down casual look that is so pervasive in our society? Ball caps don’t cut it in fine restaurants do they? Where are our standards of proper decorum? But just as quickly as I want to put up fences to keep the riff-raff out, I am reminded that Jesus wasn’t very exclusive. Unlike Augusta National, He let just about anybody into the Kingdom. It was the Pharisees who had such impossibly high standards that they missed the Messiah and the Kingdom.

Thinking of Pharisaical dress codes reminds me of a family that had invited a college student and his date over to their house for Sunday lunch. As everyone started to relax, the host said to the young man, "Why don't you take your coat off?" The host had already taken off his coat and tie. The young man kind of hem-hawed around, however, as if he didn't want to do it. Finally, he got the host off in a corner and said, reminding the man of an old trick that he knew well when he was in college, "The only parts of my shirt I ironed were the cuffs and the collar." He had pressed just the parts that showed. The rest of the shirt looked as if he had ironed it with a weedeater! That was the way of the Pharisees: the part people could see looked great, but their interiors were a different story.

Jesus wants us to look good inside out. His solution to our dress code dilemma is found in the Holy Spirit. It is the Holy Spirit’s work in Sanctifying Grace that creates clean hearts and lives in you and me. We cannot measure up on our own, but God can make us new creatures! Eugene Peterson puts it this way, "The gospel life isn't something we learn ABOUT and then put together with instructions from the manufacturer; it's something we BECOME as God does his work of creation and salvation in us and as we accustom ourselves to a life of belief and obedience and prayer."

This is a good old-fashioned Wesleyan emphasis on Sanctification. We’re saved by grace, to be sure, but there IS a dress code! Consider this pastor's dilemma:
There were two evil brothers. They were rich, and used their money to keep their evil ways from the public eye. They even attended the same church, and looked to be perfect Christians. Then their pastor retired, and a new one was hired. Not only could he see right through the brothers' deception, but he was also a good preacher so the church started to grow by leaps and bounds. A fund raising campaign was started to build a new sanctuary.

All of a sudden, one of the brothers died. The remaining brother sought out the new pastor the day before the funeral and handed him a check for the amount needed to finish paying for the new building. "I have only one condition," he said. "At my brother’s funeral, you must say that he was a saint." The pastor gave his word, and deposited the check. The next day, at the funeral, the pastor did not hold back. "He was an evil man," the pastor said. "He cheated on his wife and abused his family." After going on in this vein for awhile, he concluded with, "But compared to his brother, he was a saint." He did what he agreed to do. Quite ingenious, don't you think?

Compared with yesterday I have on pressed slacks and a dress shirt, no tie, but a blazer. I figure I owe it to the clergy I'll be seeing today to show them due respect, and the Charge Conference tonight that I care enough about their church to show it in how I look. Sounds contrived, but it's a fact: what we look like should reflect our inner opinions of who we with or what we're doing. More importantly I pray that today I will look better on the inside than the outside.

World Communion Is Real Presence

World Communion Sunday has me thinking. When I was a youngster in my home church we went to Sunday School and afterwards made our way into the sanctuary. The educational building was behind the sanctuary so that if you went from one to the other you usually entered through the back door that opened into the sanctuary right beside the pulpit and altar. If we saw the communion elements and the white cloth spread out we immediately pressed our parents into leaving early.

Communion services were so long and were as somber as a funeral service. We used the old ritual; where what we said reversed our efforts at the Protestant Reformation’s focus on grace. We went back to something that resembled a large confessional booth. We used words like, “We bewail our manifold sins and wickedness which we from time to time have committed in thought, word, and deed…” I felt sinful enough already. Our communion service seemed to add to my sense of guilt. The words of pardon were miniscule in comparison to the confession. I usually left feeling worse.

This is one reason that today when we celebrate the Lord’s Supper; we attempt to focus more on Christ’s marvelous work of grace than on our power to reform ourselves. We, more often than not, now refer to Communion as the Eucharist. Eucharist means Thanksgiving. The most important thing that we do when we come to the Communion Table is say, “Thanks!” to Christ for his gift of mercy. Rather than focus overly on our sinfulness, we thank God for God’s graciousness. What a better perspective!

World Communion Sunday is an event that bridges denominations and spotlights our commonality in the Body of Christ. This world would be so much better off if we looked for that which we hold in common rather than our differences. Holy Communion, rightly observed, reunites the Church. This is the pastor’s hope when he or she holds up the loaf of bread and says, “Because there is one loaf, we who are many, are one body in Christ.”

Therefore, our focus this week is in how to get over our differences and find common power to live in Christ. The Eucharist is a time of positive celebration, reunion, prayer for healing, and a sacred time to put others before ourselves. In my first parish I had three churches. I remember how shocked I was as I went to my first communion service at the smallest church of eight members. When I arrived there was a loaf of sliced “Wonder” bread still in its wrapper on the altar and a bottle of Welch’s grape juice and some small paper cups. They had not had communion in years. I was soon to find out why.

I went through the ritual and opened the altar for people to partake and NOBODY came forward. The reason they hadn’t had communion in years is that they were afraid. They knew full well that they were not living as consistent Christians. They felt too unworthy to come to the Table. I quickly switched sermons and preached on grace. Still nobody came up, but by the time I left there five years later, a few did. Those few moved from guilt to grace, judging to acceptance. They found real communion with Jesus, a sacrament indeed.

Dentist Thomas Welch found himself in a somewhat similar situation back in 1869. Communion was problematic for a number of reasons. The alcoholic content of the wine was one of them. Dr. Welch was the Communion Steward for the congregation of First Methodist Church of Vineland, New Jersey. To his dismay more often than not communion either set some of the participants off on an alcoholic binge or a rush to judgment by the abstention crowd. He and his family did experiment after experiment to come up with a solution and they did. He created unfermented grape juice, dubbed it “unfermented wine,” and soon churches all around wanted the product. By 1890 “Dr. Welch’s Grape Juice” had become a staple on communion tables, where it remains so today, all because someone saw communion as a sacrament that brought Christians together, not divided them!

Charge Conference Christians

Everyone wants to put on a good face for Charge Conference. They are in full swing right now. I actually went to bed last night counting how many Charge Conferences I have had instead of counting sheep. Charge Conferences are in full-swing, along with consultations with pastors about their ministry. I have heard some great reports which underscore the very reason we have these annual meetings. The most distinctive Wesleyan doctrine is sanctification. We are “Methodists” because we believe in a methodical way to live our faith, making sure that we are held accountable. All those forms are our empirical way to gauge how we’re doing spiritually. At least that’s how I rationalize it. The bottom-line is that we believe Jesus didn’t save us to leave us the way we were found, but to transform us and the world. We need transformation, not just at Charge Conference reporting time but year round.

I wish there were a pill that would really cure all that ails us. Some might say that our national malaise is the product of a poor economy, the war on terror, midterm-election year mudslinging, the disintegration of the family, and sorry football teams. It’s tough when sports, your source of distraction from life’s difficulties, only adds to the problem. What I’ve found when life is on the slippery slope is to do something worthwhile. It doesn’t matter so much what the task, just so it takes commitment.

Psychologists, for years, have said that one of the best ways to get out of the doldrums is to make yourself do something for somebody else. They’re right! If we give in to the pits we’re never going to get out. Commitment is the ability to push through the pain, the angst, the pessimistic cynical mindset in which we find ourselves and keep at the projects that we’re supposed to complete. George Miller gave an interesting analogy, “The trouble with eating Italian food is that five or six days later you’re hungry again.” What he’s saying about Italian food is true for me. It sticks with me for a long time.

When we’re a little down, we shouldn’t give in to it. We should stick to the things that we know that we’re supposed to do. Sure, I know very well that I don’t feel like going to walk, but I also know the endorphins that are released when I exercise will make me feel better. Unfortunately, many of us easily avoid the things we should do. Jerome K. Jerome, who lived from 1859-1927, said it for all sad-sacks and procrastinators, “I like work; it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.”

So maybe we shouldn’t vegetate and let our burdens build up. Doing something good and worthwhile is a better answer. It’s all about commitment. Lewis Smedes puts the matter quite plainly, “I want to say to you that if you have a ship you will not desert, if you have people you will not forsake, if you have causes you will not abandon, then you are like God… When a person makes a promise, she reaches out into an unpredictable future and makes one thing predictable: she will be there even when being there costs her more than she wants to pay. When a person makes a promise, he stretches himself out into circumstances that no one can control and control at least one thing: he will be there no matter what the circumstances turn out to be. With one simple word of promise, a person creates an island of certainty in a sea of uncertainty.”

Many years ago a pastor preached on three different kinds of believers: “if,” “because,” and “regardless.” An “if” believer follows God IF he or she receives blessings and rewards in return. This person waits to see what God will do first, then decides whether or not to respond in obedience. A “because” believer follows God BECAUSE God blesses the person. This person has seen the connection between personal obedience and God’s blessing and wants to keep it going. A “regardless” believer follows God REGARDLESS of the person’s circumstances, cynicism, and hardships. A “regardless” believer honors commitment and knows that God is faithful to the faithful. Which am I today when it comes to the seemingly mundane paperwork and meeting schedule that exhibits a long obedience in God’s direction?

Mystery of Suicide

I woke up this morning to hear the news that Kenny McKinley, former University of South Carolina, star football receiver had apparently taken his own life. Friends, former teammates, coaches, and fans are shocked. He was here at the USC-Georgia game two weeks ago. According to everyone, he seemed fine. Of course, he has been injury-plagued over the last two years with the Denver Broncos. There was no suicide note, no explanation. Other than his injury there was no thought that something like this would happen.

I have never experienced suicide in my own family, but as a pastor I have dealt with quite a few. Every time I was shocked. One was especially difficult. It was an older man who was beloved in the community. His wife had some very tough health issues and had to be moved to an assisted living community. Apparently, he couldn't take it and took his own life. I have preached the funeral of a murder suicide, too, and there have been other tragic events in the churches that I served where someone took thier own life.

It is always hard for me as a pastor to know what to say in this situation. And I have often wondered why I didn't pick up on some kind of signal that this might happen. I have felt the sting of the prophet Jeremiah's words when he warns that we should not say, "Peace, peace, when there is no peace." Yet, the presence of the Incarnate Christ who came to know our pain as the Man of Sorrows gives us hope, whether we can say the right words or not.

I try to think of God's mercy like this: If human courts will acquit someone of murder because of insanity, then God's mercy surely must prove more complete than that. I have known people so full of despair that they couldn't see past their own hand much less their problems. In that moment of sheer pain and darkness they have done the unthinkable. I pray in God's mercy that they are just as acquitted as we humans would absolve the temporarily insane.

It's a mystery, and no easy answer is forthcoming. I'm reminded of Deuteronomy 29:29 again and again, "The secret things belong to the Lord our God, but the things revealed belong to us and our children forever, that we may follow all the words of this law." What this means to me is that there are some things we can't know or perceive and we must leave those unfathomable mysteries to God. Let's stick to what we can know and about which we can do something.

I'm certainly not advocating suicide as an option to life's dilemmas. Its pain and unresolved issues for families last generations. There is NOTHING beneficial that can come from doing such a thing, but I think God's word to me this morning is to cut people who have committed suicide some slack, and open my eyes to the unseen hurts around me. A simple "Hey, How are you?" isn't enough to delve into the human heart. If there's anything at all to take from this it is to live more intentionally in community where we rub shoulders and look into one another's faces and hearts. Facebook is a good thing but it cannot replace real community, face-to-face.

The Church is the best place for us to have deep relationships with one another. Small groups, Sunday School classes, mission projects, and other significant church activities put us side by side in an intimate setting where we can get to know the unseen pain of others. In our economically dark and terror-filled world, we need Jesus and He is most easily seen in one another. I hurt for the McKinley family and for any family that has faced such a tragedy. May they find peace among us, and help through us.

Holy Spirt or Holy Spirit

Have you ever felt so tired that you feel like a bug smacked on a windshield, or as flat as a frog run over in the road? That's how this Friday is hitting me. Its been an emotional week, anxiety then great news about Narcie, charge conferences every night with some tensions and a lot of celebration, phone calls to pastors/churches about their connectional giving, and the usual swinging door cacophony of people who don't like something about their pastor or something else. I have had consultations all week with clergy and that has been so good. Sharing prayer, support, and visioning for the future - good stuff, but I'm beat. I used to get up in the morning and walk for a hour praying my way to strength for the day. I'm too busy/tired to do it right now.

We're planning on going to see Narcie, Mike, Enoch & Evy, plus Josh and Karen this afternoon, spend the night coming back to Columbia tomorrow to go to the USC-Furman game with my brother, preach a church anniversary Sunday am followed by 3 charge conferences and a new Hispanic/Latino church start meeting. Whew! When will there be a let-up? So much for Sabbath, but we must have time to reflect and worship or we don't have anything to offer this hurting world. Every minister that I've talked to has shared their fatigue, some with tears, some with excitement tinged with fear of running out of gas. Some have been all smiles. What has made for more smiles than miles? It seems that the clergy who are taking care of themselves through exercise, time off, date nights, or some kind of Sabbath are the ones who are still smiling.

In reading lately about how many more Americans are below the poverty line right now tells me that they need the Gospel's message of hope now more than ever. If we're beat or beat-up then we aren't the voice of hope. They're going to go to the upbeat church with the upbeat music with the upbeat sermon. If we aren't full of the Holy Spirit then we won't have anything to offer. I'm afraid I resemble a Holy Spirt more than Spirit. So, I am running on empty, but ready to relax and recharge. Got to, have to, must get some nourishment from God if I'm going to be an effective witness for Christ. May God's grace win your heart this weekend and not the tyranny of the urgent. I'm going to start prayer-walking again in the morning.